I went through a big chunk of my life feeling so overwhelmed by the idea of learning to love change that I became completely insular. The free-spirited adventure girl that was excited by life and all its possibilities had dried up and disappeared, replaced instead, with a shadow of herself, riddled with anxiety and numbness.
I beat myself up about it, disappointed at how pathetic I’d become. I’d lost myself and in the process, I had managed to completely silence my Voice.
When we become disempowered, we lose all our inner strength. We forget our capabilities and our direction, the plans we’d made suddenly become foggy and disappear into the distance. We put our entire selves on hold and meanwhile, time ticks into the future, and we watch people around us busy making plans and changing their lives.
It took me a long time to re-emerge and to recognise that what I had experienced was the Universe’s way of giving me a major Wake Up call. I was forced to experience being taken to the lowest point I could be in my life and losing my Voice in order to hopefully see it as a valuable lesson in forcing change.
Lucky for me, it worked.
I used to be so scared of change. But not any more. Places of discomfort have always led me to my greatest personal breakthroughs. The worst periods of my life, have always, without fail delivered the greatest change and led me to the most rewarding possibilities, experiences and encounters with people. They have allowed me to step into my best self. Once that’s awakened, you can never go back.
Getting stuck took me so far away from my passion and everything I wanted to do. It led me down a path unrecognisable to all that I wanted or envisioned for my life. It was like a domino effect: discomfort led to agitation, that led to me losing my confidence, that led me to abandoning my Writing, that finally led to me losing my Voice.
Those dark periods feel like there’s no exit. But they demand Patience and Trust. When you are at your most vulnerable, neither feels possible. What we fail to see in those moments of change is that there is a far greater picture waiting to be revealed on the horizon.
Regardless of how challenged I have felt by change throughout my life, there is one thing that it has proven to me time and time again. The process of shifting has NEVER failed me. Each time I have gone through emotional turbulence, I have always emerged unscathed and have arrived at a place in myself with the greatest strength in character and clarity than ever before.
I have learnt to trust the process of Transitioning. Letting go of my Fear has led me to step into the life I always wanted – reconnecting with my love for Writing and living a life with passion, following my heart, feeling the most solid in my footing than I have ever felt before and finally reclaiming my Voice.
One of my favourite quotes from writer Anais Nin on the process of change is this one:
“And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to change.”
Happy travels Paula
p.s: If you feel like you’ve lost your Voice and want to learn how to reclaim it, there are only 8 PLACES AVAILABLE for my Cultivating Confidence and Trusting Your Voice 2018 Workshop. All details HERE